c’est la me-An Open Letter to The Lion that Sleeps Among Wolves

Have you ever woken up one day and felt like a whole new person?

Today’s Jams: The Run and Go-twenty one pilots

Dear reader,

My life is constantly changing.

Up until about two weeks ago, the daily tasks of life stressed me out. Anything that was out of the ordinary gave me anxiety. I tirelessly wondered what happened in my life that made me this way, and I found that the answer was simple. I was on the phone with a friend of mine and he was talking about his goals for his future and his sense of adventure.

That was it.

I spent my childhood being someone who craved going out there and exploring, making every day a new adventure. Then, the time came for me to grow up and start scheduling away what I wanted to be random. I got too comfortable with being comfortable, and I was unsatisfied. That gave me my high stress levels. I never lost that spirit of adventure, I just covered it up because I felt like I had to. 

When life presents a challenge, take it and win.

As soon as I realized I was losing myself in being too strict again, I tried to find ways to loosen up but still keep my concrete foundation. I can live life adventurously and still grind, still be on my game. It’s about how I react to situations that gives me the upper hand in one happens in this chain of events we call life. I’ve been hit with some major adversity, but I choose to grow. To battle through it. So my challenge is this: figure out what makes you happy, and depend on yourself to do a little bit of it every day. Sometimes it doesn’t have to be physical. It can be emotional or spiritual. Just feeling like I’m in an adventurous state makes me satisfied. 

For example. In my life, there’s someone great. I had to walk away from one relationship to find what I was missing. I’ve realized that he’s the person I’ve seen myself with for years, but we have some work to do before we can really thrive as a couple. Life has thrown obstacles at our way and has made what we can do look damn near impossible. But here’s the funny thing about strength: it’s the silver lining that makes clouds worth struggling through. Daily, I see little things strengthen in our relationship, and little hurdles overcome that’ll make us victorious in the long run. In finding him, I’ve found a bit of me. What I’ve lost. It’s worth it to me, no matter what happens. I’m a fighter. I’ve got nineteen years worth of thrilling anecdotes to prove it true. If there’s something you want that seems is too hard to achieve, it’s not. That’s your head trying to fool you into thinking you’re not powerful enough. Reality will prove it wrong. It just takes action. 

You have that drive. You have that animal inside of you. Awaken it. Take what’s yours and don’t look back.

I used to think I was weak for reacting the way I did to things. I used to think I was scared for not being reckless with my life. Now, I realize that someone else’s story isn’t mine. And I will fail numerous times before I win. One of the biggest parts of being strong is being weak. I have the power to do what I want with my story to make it an impactful read for me. I’m growing every day, and what’s more special, I’m growing with you all. I’m not the same person from February who wanted to blog to see if her voice would be heard. Now, I have proof that what I’m saying means something. And that something is all the world to me. It keeps me going. The support keeps me level when I forget who I am. So not only is this an open letter to remind you of what you are and aren’t, to remind you that you are a fighter, but to thank you for hanging on this long. With me. In your life, in your troubles. Thank you for overcoming. You deserve to be where you are now. And if you don’t think you do, change it. Work at it endlessly until you can. Because I know you can.

xx, Kay.

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